-Calvin Symons- whats in the name?

VIVA AZZURRI!!!

2006-07-05T07:20:00.000+08:00

They said it couldn't be done. They said that it was sheer luck that steered the Azzurri into this stage of the competition. They said that the Germans were too strong of an opponent for them. They said, they said, and they kept saying...

Well, to all ye naysayers out there, keep singing that song of doubt in your hearts because the Azzurri has made to the finals of the FIFA WORLD CUP 2006...a feat that would surely silence the jeers of even the most avid German fan! It was a glorious night, shrouded only by the skepticism and overwhelming German support at the local "teh tarik" shop in Taman Tun Dr. Ismail. It was ohh so sweet as I saw on the big screen projection TV - the goal that saw the Italians through to the finals of the 2006 World Cup in Germany. That goal was made even more memorable as my fellow Italian supporters roared in ubiquitous jubilation as Alessandro Del Piero clinically slotted a cheekily passed through ball from Alberto Gilardino over the outstretched arms of the intimidating presence of Jens Lehman, the number 1 choice German goal keeper.

The final score...2-0 to Italy!! But to be fair to the Germans, the scoreline did not reflect the attacking prowess the Germans had as well as the countless opportunities they had to put the match beyond the Italian's reach. Having said that however, there IS a reason why the Italians have only conceded a single goal so far in this competition. Much of this can be credited to one man - Fabia Cannavaro. Yes...standing at only 1.76cm (5 feet, 9 inches), he hardly commends respect from the towering German strikers. But watch him in action in a single competitive game and I can assure you that his defensive qualities will not go unnoticed. Fabio Cannavaro IS the heart and soul of the Italian's back 4, as was proved time and again in this match against Germany. This highly charged match however needed more than just the allocated playing time to determine a winner. A full 30 minutes of extra time had to be played to ensure that a victor would emerge from The battle of Dortmund.

In the end however, only one team could advance to the final stage, only one team could emerge a victor and sadly, one team a loser. On this memorable night, (a night which saw the Azzurri, the underdogs against the Germans, advance to the final) a funny but delightful feeling is cultivating deep within the souls of all Italian supporters, young and old, thin and fat, woman and man alike; a feeling that can only be expressed though shouts of elation, screams of joy and leaps of celebration as their beloved team advances through to the finals of the 2006 World Cup in Germany, where they await their final opponent, their final challenger, but more importantly, they await their fellow ambassadors of the greatest sport in the world...FOOTBALL!!!!! VIVA AZZURRI!!!

The Anatomy of the Knee

2006-06-27T03:06:00.000+08:00

The Knee, one of the more weakly put together joints of the human body. Unlike the hip, where the femur (the thigh bone) is connected securely in a form of a ball-and-socket joint to the pelvis bone, the knee is put together rather shabily. Held together by 4 main ligaments as well as other muscles and tendons, the knee is transformed from a rather week joint to a complex, formidable marvel of the human body. Lets take a look at how the knee is formed and what holds it together, seemingly enabling a simple task like walking, so effortless.

***this article was taken from http://www.aclsolutions.com/anatomy.php***

Let's begin with the basics of knee anatomy. The knee joint is made up of three bones and a variety of ligaments. It is formed by the femur (the thigh bone), the tibia (the shin bone), and the patella (the kneecap). Several muscles and ligaments control the motion of the knee and protect it from damage at the same time. Two ligaments on either side of the knee, called the medial (MCL) and lateral collateral ligaments (LCL), stabilize the knee from side-to-side.

The anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) is one of a pair of ligaments in the center of the knee joint that form a cross, and this is where the name "cruciate" comes from. There is both an anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) and a posterior cruciate ligament (PCL). Both of these ligaments function to stabilize the knee from front-to-back during normal and athletic activities. The ligaments of the knee make sure that the weight that is transmitted through the knee joint is centered within the joint minimizing the amount of wear and tear on the cartilage inside the knee.

The weight-bearing surfaces of your knees are covered with a layer of cartilage (referred to by doctors as"articular cartilage"). There are also two shock absorbers in your knee on either side of the joint between the cartilage surfaces of the femur and the tibia. These two structures are called the medial meniscus and the lateral meniscus. The menisci are horseshoe-shaped shock absorbers that help to both center the knee joint during activity and to minimize the amount of stress on the articular cartilage. The combination of the menisci and the surface cartilage in your knee produces a nearly frictionless gliding surface. Working together as a single unit, the ligaments, cartilage and menisci make the knee an incredible joint; strong, flexible, and robust.

***this article was taken from http://www.aclsolutions.com/anatomy.php***

Now, the main reason for all that biological gibberish! Having always been a rather large kid (to be politically correct), i was always proud of the fact that i was rather athletic for my size. I was involved in a lot of sporting events like basketball, football and badminton, and was quite good at those games mind you. However, age does have an effect on a person's dexterity and agility, especially one that is overweight as myself. Being 24 years young, i always thought that my agility would always be with me, as i have proven again and again in high school, with my nifty footwork and lightning fast acceleration (again fast for my size), i would mesmerize many a defender on the football field. Well, i was sorely mistaken as i would find out the hard way.

It was on the 12th of June that my agility was put to the test (damn, im really making this sound a whole lot more dramatic arent i?). I was anticipating a good, energatic game of futsal or indoor football (for the benefit of my fellow american friends). It had been more than 2 months now that our regular 8-10pm slot was cancelled due to some booking preference. So, after much deliberation, we managed to get a booking for Mondays, 8-10pm and let me tell you, it was sweet music to my ears when i heard the news. The guys from work told me that futsal would officially resume every Monday starting on the 12th of June. So, i happily strolled along my merry way to the futsal court after work to have a game of good "man to man" futsal with the blokes. But alas, as Murphy's Law would have it, the most unforseen circumstance had to occur. I was chasing a pass that was rather out of my reach. Being the idiot that i am, i thought i'd stretch for the ball and make an acrobatic effort to ram the ball into the back of the opponents net. It was all so clear to me in my mind what was to happen. Unfortunately, the ball didnt end up at the back of the opponent's net as envisioned. No, far from it! It ended up near the corner flag actually! That however, was the least of my worries. Somehow, in the tussle of trying to reach for the ball with my right leg and nimbly trying to control it to slot it into the net, my pivot foot slipped (at least thats what the guys said happened), and my left knee gave way! Yeah, not a very pleasent feeling. Remember the make up of the knee i was talking about? Well, yeah, i tore (partial tear) 2 /4 main ligaments that hold the knee together; the MCL and the LCL. Docs say that i may have tore my ACL as well, but considering that there wasnt much swelling on my knee, he said it might just be a pull.

So, i was taken to the docs that night itself (by 2 very loyal friends i must say) but was told to come back for a magnetic resonance imaging or MRI scan the next day. The MRI confirmed the doc's inital impression that i partially tore both my MCL and LCL. My ACL remains a question mark. Hence a follow up was scheduled for the 27th of June.

So, long story short, i leant TWO important lessons from this dramatic incident. Firstly, it is a grave inconvenience when an injury to the knee has been sustained such as mine; It takes me 2 minutes just to climb up a few bloody steps to get to my bedroom (it normally takes me 5 seconds). I cant bend my knee fully which makes taking a shit immensely difficult. And lastly, i cant bloody play football for the next 4 months at least!!! Ohhh the pain!!! And thats only the FIRST lesson. The SECOND lesson i learnt...never think for one moment that an agile "fatty" can do the things a normal agile person can...CAUSE IT JUST AINT WORTH IT!!!

But on the plus side, i get to sit home to recuperate and watch all the tv i want until my knee heals. And hence me updating my blog at 6 freaking o'clock in the morning!

Food for thought...literally

2006-03-12T23:48:00.000+08:00

So, I was having a short discussion with one of my friends the other day and we concluded that the world as we know it is coming to an end. These are the reasons to support our claim:-

1) It all started when the mad cow pandemic hit. It was a blow to meat lovers everywhere. Laying off that sweet, succulent, tender steak at Chili's was just too much to bear. Hence the increase in consumption of one of the earliest birds around...the chicken.

2) But alas, the joy of having that oh so reminiscent...that oh so familiar taste of white meat was short lived as the damned H5N1 virus decided to attack our beloved livestock.

3) So, our attention was turned towards pork. Ahhhh, the lovely unique taste of Asian marinated "siew yoke" or barbecued pork never cease to tantilise my taste buds everytime I put a mouthful of it in my mouth. But again, as nature would have it, this joy was short lived. The dreaded JE virus, also known as Japanese Encephalitis, caused by the pesky Culex tritaeniorhynchus - a group of rice field breeding mosquitoes, transmits the deadly virus by feeding on domestic pigs, rendering the pigs infected. Once again, a new avenue had to be found for our meat eating brethren. With white and red meat already off limits, we had to turn our focus to seafood.

4) Seafood, an acquired taste by some and becoming an increasing necessity with the absence of white and red meat. The most common seafood dish...the fish. With thousands of species in the deep blue sea, we, the meat eaters could at least salvage what was left of the "meat" that was provided in this world. In time, more and more traditional meat eaters were acclimating and getting accustomed to the now more familiar taste of that crumbling, soft textured meat...fish. But again, as Murphy's Law would have it, that too was to be a temporary solution. Once again mother nature decided to unleash its fury when the largest Asian Tsunami erupted in December 2004. Registering a 9.1 on the Richter scale, this underwater explosion caused 180000 casualties and 40000 people missing. Countless bodies were left unclaimed and many more left unfound. Government regulations especially in South East Asia warned its people to "lay off" seafood for a while, as fish were now feeding on us. Ohhh the irony of it! And so once again, a new avenue had to be found to satisfy our fellow carnivors. But there were no more avenues as all our earthly "meat" had been contaminated. We were relegated to the ranks of vegetarians. *To my dear vegetarian and vegan friends, please disregard the previous sentence...thank you ;)*

And so the discussion with my friend ends with the fact that we, fellow meat eaters, refuse to succumb to nature's exclusive selection of animal genocide and therefore revert to cannibalism, an old but necessary survival instinct. But then, we conluded that consuming human flesh would result in the spreading of the notorious Hand, Foot and Mouth disease, rendering meat eaters world wide without ANY source of meat! Hence the conclusion that the world as we know it, is coming to an end!

The return of the Malaysian Invasion

2006-03-02T21:51:00.000+08:00

So I guess me apologizing profusely is not going to suffice. But to my defense, I HAVE been really busy since I got back to Malaysia. I left Iowa on December 2nd and I still remember vividly how much it snowed that day. It was as if the weather in Iowa knew that I was going to be leaving the US for good and so it decided to shower me with the one thing I would not be able to find in Malaysia, which is snow! How fitting! I reached home at a time that was not only hectic but a little bit difficult for me I must say. I came back just in time for my parents' 25th anniversary, just in time for Christmas, just in time for the New Year, just in time for the CHINESE New Year and of course my 24th birthday. All of which had a lot of significance to my family and I. So one can only imagine the amount of preparation going on in just a span of 2 months. On top of that, I had to cope with a little something called "readjusting". I didn't think much of the transition period from college life to working life. It was by no means an easy one as some of you working folks might already know. It was rather rough I must say. It was not something that I can articulate in words, but rather more of a feeling that seemed to linger on in me. It sort of took a chunk out of my zest for life...somehow when I left Iowa, it felt that I was leaving a big part of me there as well. And the fact that I was returning to Malaysia WITHOUT a job, was not something that I was proud of. On top of that, I didn't have the consolation of having someone relate to my situation as I was the first in my family to actually go overseas and return. Inevitably, slowly but surely, I got back to my old self. It took some time though. I laid off the job searching for about a month because I wanted this transition period to be as managable as possible, as stress free as possible. I wanted to find that familiar ground I once stood on 4 years ago, before I left for the States.

However, it seemed that jobs were out to get me as opposed to the already familiar trend of me hopelessly trying to get a job. I still remember the day when I got a call from a recruiter...it was a Wednesday,18th of Jan. The recruiter from Scicom wanted to interview me for a technical support executive position. First thing that came to my mind was, "How in the hell did they get my number?" Well, it turns out that a high school friend of mind had recommended me to the HR recruiter and gave her my number. So that was that. I was to go into Scicom for an interview on Friday, 10am. So I did. For those of you who know my interviewing antics, you'd know that I like to conduct a thorough "investigation" of the company so as to "impress" my potential interviewer. Well, apparently I overdid it as some of my close buddies had predicted.
You see, being well prepared for an interview in the States is a plus but apparently in Malaysia...lets just say that that effort and time put into thoroughly preparing yourself is better of spent on something more constructive, like planning a surprise farewell, which by the way, was AWESOME!!! Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. My experiences with each and every one of you I will carry on for the rest of my life. Of course, I just couldn't keep you wonderful people to myself so I had to tell my friends here about you folks. So now they pretty much know who you all are...hahahah!!

So anyway...damn that was some segwey...so I go into the interview...proudly carrying my Iowa stamped resume folder. There were 7 candidates applying for the same position that day. I was the 4th to be called for the interview. The interview itself was no more than 30 minutes, with the interviewer asking me just 3 questions. Question 1 was "Tell me about yourself?" followed by question 2, which was, "Tell me what you know about what we do here at Scicom" and finally the 3rd question was, "What do you think about the saying, "Customer is always right?"" I breezed through the first 2 and attempted to answer the 3rd to the best of my ability...which seem to work because I got a call from the HR recruiter at 4pm that day itself, offering me the job. So, like I told my friends back in Malaysia, "Its either I was really good or they were really desperate." I tend to favor the former better though. ;)

So I was scheduled for work the following Monday which was the 23rd of Jan. Really had no idea what was to be expected of me. I later found out that I was the only one out of the 7 candidates to be chosen for the position. However, because of that, I was the only one of 2 people in this new batch of entry levels. The management wanted to put us into the previous batch that already had about 20 odd people for 1 month training, but we were 2 weeks too late so we had to wait for more applicants to start a new batch. After all that drama was settled, I was put into a one week induction seminar or "soft skill" training, which was where I got a bigger picture of what I would be doing for the next 1 year. In a nutshell, Scicom, which is short for "Science of Communication", is Malaysia's leading Business Process Outsourcing (BPO) company that serves international companies looking to outsource core elements of their customer care operations in the South East Asia region. Hewlett Packard, Dell, IBM, Citibank, Sony, Dunhill and Nokia are just some of the many well known clients that trust Scicom's superior services. I am working for Nokia, which is one of the worlds largest mobile/cell phones manufacturer and also one of the largest client of Scicom. We manufacture GSM, CDMA and even WCDMA phones. For those interested and want to know more about Scicom as well as Nokia, I've provided 3 links that will take you to Scicom's and Nokia's webpage: http://www.scicom-intl.com/ and http://www.nokia.com/ or http://www.nokiausa.com/index/1,7905,,00.html for you folks in the USA.

The picture above is my induction group. As you can see, it is very much a melting pot of several races, cultures and nationalities. Besides Malaysia, we have folks from Pakistan, Indonesia, and the Philippines. I am of course the only guy wearing blue!
So thus far, I have been in Scicom for slightly more than a month now and I must say it has been fantastic. I get to deal with people everyday and because of the nature of the job, I get to talk to tons of people who are calling all over the Asia Pacific region like Australia, New Zealand and Singapore. Plus with the technial background I have, it is much easier for me in dealing with technical queries from customers calling in. So, until January of next year, I will be with Scicom unless my crazy antics get me into trouble again...

10 simple ways to STOP worrying and start LIVING!

2005-09-28T17:51:00.000+08:00

TEN GUIDELINES FROM GOD

Effective immediately, please be aware that there are changes YOU need to make in YOUR life. These changes need to be completed in order that I may fulfill My promises to you to grant you peace, joy and happiness in this life. I apologize for any inconvenience, but after all that I am doing, this seems very little to ask of you. Please, follow these 10 guidelines

1. QUIT WORRYING: Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sit and worry. Have you forgotten that I am here to take all your burdens and carry them for you? Or do you just enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?

2. PUT IT ON THE LIST: Something needs done or taken care of. Put it on the list. No, not YOUR list. Put it on MY to-do-list. Let ME be the one to take care of the problem. I can't help you until you turn it over to Me. And although My to-do list is long, I am after all...God. I can take care of anything you put into My hands. In fact, if the truth were ever really known, I take care of a lot of things for you that you never even realize.

3. TRUST ME: Once you've given your burdens to Me, quit trying to take them back. Trust in Me. Have the faith that I will take care of all your needs, your problems and your trials. Problems with the kids? Put them on My list. Problem with finances? Put it on My list. Problems with your emotional roller coaster? For My sake, put it on My list. I want to help you. All you have to do is ask.

4. LEAVE IT ALONE: Don't wake up one morning and say, "Well, I'm feeling much stronger now, I think I can handle it from here." Why do you think you are feeling stronger now? It's simple. You gave Me your burdens and I'm taking care of them. I also renew your strength and cover you in my peace. Don't you know that if I give you these problems back, you will be right back where you started? Leave them with Me and forget about them. Just let Me do my job.

5. TALK TO ME: I want you to forget a lot of things. Forget what was making you crazy. Forget the worry and the fretting because you know I'm in control. But there's one thing I pray you never forget. Please, don't forget to talk to Me - OFTEN! I love YOU! I want to hear your voice. I want you to include Me in on the things going on in your life. I want to hear you talk about your friends and family. Prayer is simply you having a conversation with Me. I want to be your dearest friend.

6. HAVE FAITH: I see a lot of things that you can't see from where you are. Have faith in Me that I know what I'm doing. Trust Me; you wouldn't want the view from My eyes. I will continue to care for you, watch over you, and meet your needs. You only have to trust Me. Although I have a much bigger task than you, it seems as if you have so much trouble just doing your simple part. How hard can trust be?

7. SHARE: You were taught to share when you were only two years old. When did you forget? That rule still applies. Share with those who are less fortunate than you. Share your joy with those who need encouragement. Share your laughter with those who haven't heard any in such a long time. Share your tears with those who have forgotten how to cry. Share your faith with those who have none.

8. BE PATIENT: I managed to fix it so in just one lifetime you could have so many diverse experiences. You grow from a child to an adult, have children, change jobs many times, learn many trades, travel to so many places, meet thousands of people, and experience so much. How can you be so impatient then when it takes Me a little longer than you expect to handle something on My to-do list? Trust in My timing, for My timing is perfect. Just because I created the entire universe in only six days, everyone thinks I should always rush, rush, rush.

9. BE KIND: Be kind to others, for I love them just as much as I love you. They may not dress like you, or talk like you, or live the same way you do, but I still love you all. Please try to get along, for My sake. I created each of you different in some way. It would be too boring if you were all identical. Please, know I love each of your differences.

10. LOVE YOURSELF: As much as I love you, how can you not love yourself? You were created by me for one reason only -- to be loved, and to love in return. I am a God of Love. Love Me. Love your neighbors. But also love yourself. It makes My heart ache when I see you so angry with yourself when things go wrong. You are very precious to me. Don't ever forget.

The Attitude of Employers and the Solution to Unemployment in the 21st Century

2005-07-29T10:48:00.000+08:00

Why in the hell is it so damn hard to get a job? If you really think about it, jobs should come knocking at your door just like mail is delivered daily. Lets take a look at it mathematically.

mum + dad = you

you = speed ; speed = distance /time

where;
speed = how fast you land yourself a job (books/year)
time = your age (year)
distance = the amout of education you've received (books)

* 1 book = (year)*(year)

I'll come back to this in a little bit. But at the moment, lets take a look at what happens to us as babies once outside our mother's womb. From the moment we were born, we were already studying...eyes fixated on anything bright and colorful. Ever wonder why babies have such big eyes? Bloody sensory shock!! Thats why!! Nonetheless, they want to scan, study, take everything in!! And even though new born babies can only see approximately 9 inches away from them...they are always examining their surroundings, trying to absorb every detail of this new fascinating world...like a human sponge. You would think that babies would be experiencing a sensory overload given the fact that all babies have been looking at for the past 9 months is their mother's uterus. AND THEY DO!! How bloody exciting!

Then, at the tender age of 4, we (most of us) were put into pre school...to do what? Supposedly to prepare us for gradeschool. And then, at the age of 7, we were put through gradeschool. For what? To get ready for high-school. And then, at the age of 13, as though we didnt have enough to deal with already at an age where everything about us was not right, (boys had to deal with the fact (among many others) that their voice had two octaves now. The worst part about that was that they didnt have control as to where and when the high octave would project itself. Girls had to deal with the fact that they now had to wear an extra article of clothing, a weird looking piece of cloth...that barely covers anything mind you...and would even make Einstein scratch his head and wonder.) we had to deal with learning and taking in even more...physics, chemistry,calculus, economics...etc. To make things even better, we had to endure that for a whole 5 years! And then, when it seems like theres a light at the end of a dark tunnel...the grand daddy of them all shows up...we were put into college. For a full 4 years (Thats what most colleges tell you, but most people actually take 5 years to attain a Bachelors degree)...and this is of course for those who decide NOT to go to graduate school!

All this for what? The search for ultimate knowledge? For financial freedom. For a better life? Since the very day we could comprehend the complexity of the spoken language, it has been drummed into us that education and knowledge is absolutely imperative (some countries even more than others) if we were to be successful in the future. For those of us who have heeded the call of competitive education, now what?

GET A JOB!! Now here's where I dont get it! It should be pretty darn clear by now that most (priveledged individuals) of us as humans, have been studying for at least 17 years of our lives, all the way from pre-school to undergraduate studies. You would think that any living organism being pumped with all sorts of indisputable knowledge should have head hunters knocking on their doors, asking them, in fact begging them for their expertise. But no! In reality, it is quite the opposite.

Lets take a look at the mathematical equation I talked about a while ago.

Now, according to this equation, all of the following are true:
1) This equation will only hold true under 2 conditions:
i) The minimum distance is 17 books (minimum of a bachelors degree)
ii) The earliest schooling age is 5 years old.
2) Abiding by these 2 conditions, the maximum speed is ( 0.24 years = 2.86 months)
3) The amount of education received, will porpotionately affect the speed of you getting a job; the longer the distance, the faster your speed.
4) Distance will always be smaller than time, given the initial conditions. The only way to close that gap is to receive more formal education.
5) As a person ages, time increases, therefore increasing the speed. (In most cases, this is generally true because experience comes with age. This is something that prospective employers value and most universities CANNOT give...experience.)

Now, having clarified what IS true, lets take a look at what SHOULD be true:
1) Given the fact that society in the 21st century is becoming more competitive education wise, the minimum distance as mentioned earlier is 17 books. Now, the fact that most humans today only live to see 70 (thats being generous by the way), that means that 17/70 hard years of toil and sweat have been put into getting that bachelors degree. Thats a whopping 24% of our lives dedicated to formal education. (And thats just the minimum. Remember that to increase speed, distance has to be increased too.) It should be clear to prospective employers that a person with that much knowledge should be capable of performing a simple specific task (normally allocated when a job is found) given the fact that most of us have been multi-tasking for at least 4 or 5 years in college (homework, midterms, labs, social life, finals, group projects, social life...) But this is not the case.
2) Given the fact that 24% of a lifetime is a huge chunk, prospective employers should be eager in hiring fresh graduates. This, in my professional opinion, is the solution to unemployment. But again in reality, this is not the case.

*President Bush are you reading this?*

3) Because prospective employers value experience, only more "mature" audience have a chance of increasing their speed. But why should this be? If you ask me, 24% of a lifetime dedicated to formal education is MORE than enough to convince ANYONE that I am a capable individual equipped with the necessary skills to excel in the industry I specialized in. Again, this is not the case as prospective employers do not see eye to eye with me on this point.

Having made my point regarding society's inapt ability to recognize talent when they see it, it is no wonder that I (and many other fresh graduates out there) am a 23 year old graduate with Bachelor of Science in electrical and computer engineering who is still unemployed...just waiting, in fact imploring prospective employers to recognize me as being a capable worker.

What women want or THINK they want

2005-04-23T16:35:00.000+08:00

So, i came across an article (Thanks Kasak) that truely summarizes the trials and tribulations of "nice guys" in todays society. So for all you girls (guys as well), read up and please, read it with an open mind. If you disagree with it, i'd like to hear from you. Have fun!

Ode to the Nice Guys

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

joke of the month (26/6/04)

2004-06-26T20:46:00.001+08:00

Ok ok ok....so this may be a little lame for it to be the joke of the month...but i thought it was funny! So sue me!!!!!!!!!!!

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard
the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his
5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper
burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting,
then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The
minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous
dignity intoned his version of what he thought his Father always said:
"Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn ... and into the hole
he gooooes."